How to Go About Saying Yes to the Dress Simple Wedding Guide

How to Go About Saying Yes to the Dress

Jul 18, 2011
Molly Claire Ratcliffe

Grace Kelly’s unforgettable wedding gown – Wikipedia A Bride-To-Be’s guide based on personal experience, on purchasing the most important garment of clothing you will ever buy- your wedding dress!

The wedding gown. You could say that it is the most important piece of clothing that a woman will ever wear. For centuries, the traditional Western dress has followed the same three basic principles; white, floor-length, and completed with a veil. The white is to represent purity, the floor-length a sign of formality and modesty, and the veil to represent purity once again, as well as modesty and mystery.

My Experience

I just purchased my wedding dress; 21 years after being born, 7 years after meeting my fiance and 11 months before my wedding. I’m still finding it hard to believe that I’ve actually done it. That all the shopping for “the dress” is over, and this milestone has now come and gone.

When I put it on for the last time, before my parents signed the papers for what felt like the purchase of a new car, my palms began to sweat profusely, my stomach was turning, and I was having a hot flash. Despite my nervous discomfort, I felt taller, slimmer, happier, and even though I was standing still, trying not to trip on the unhemmed skirt, there was a kick in my step. When a woman becomes pregnant she claims she “just knows” and can be described as “glowing”. Well I just knew, and I was glowing…but I was not pregnant. I had found my wedding dress.

My Rules

Since my dress has now been conceived and I am now six months away from my first fitting, I now feel like somewhat of a wedding dress expert. Here are four steps that I took that gave me a flawless dress shopping experience, and will hopefully work for you too.

1. Research

I have read many magazine articles that say a wedding dress try-on can be a fun Saturday afternoon activity with the girls, or a bonding exercise for you, your mother, and your mother-in-law. One article I read even suggested trying dresses on before you are engaged, to get a feel for what you like and how much dresses go for before you say yes to your boyfriend’s supposed upcoming proposal. Stay away from the stores! Instead do lots of visual research. Look, but don’t touch. Flip through magazines, check out bridal designer websites, research what is going to be in this season, or just simply do a Google image search for “wedding dresses”. Going into the store too early will ruin the experience, and will drag out the shopping process too long.

2. Have an open mind

I understand why many articles in bridal magazines recommend that you choose a dress based on your body type, and give you many examples of what looks good on a pear, carrot, or hourglass figure. I understand they are trying to help every woman feel liberated and comfortable in their own skin. That’s great. But you honestly can’t tell what looks good on you until you try. Go in with an open mind. Try on the ball gown, the Greek goddess, the mermaid, the Pippa Middleton bum-hugger, heck, even try on the short, white, cocktail dress. If you think it looks great on the rack, then take a chance and try it on. Who knows, it might look even better on you, no matter what your body type.

Read This Next

Best Plus Size Mother of the Bride Outfits for Plus-Sized Moms
Best Plus Size Bridesmaid Dresses for Big and Tall Bridesmaids
The Trendsetting Bride: Planning Your Wedding in 2011

3. The rule of thirds

I was told from the beginning of my dress hunt that you should stick to three stores, and three stores alone. By the time you are ready to move on to a fourth store, you need to re-visit the last three you went to and make a decision. As tempting as it is to go all over town trying on each and every dress at each and every boutique, it is not a good idea and will only cause stress and confusion. By going to only three stores, you have a goal to find the dress. You will take your shopping time more seriously instead of getting flustered and giddy by the overwhelming amount of white puffy sparkliness.

Your brain can only handle so much white, and by going to every store you will become confused and won’t remember what dress was where and what you liked or didn’t like. If you’re worried that the three stores you might pick are not the right stores, do your research. Obviously, if you have a tight budget don’t pick Vera Wang as one of your three stores. As fun as it would be to try on haute couture, you would be wasting your time. I didn’t think I could limit myself to three stores either, but it helped me make a better decision and ultimately led me to my dress.

4. The entourage

Leave the court at the castle. Everyone is excited that you are getting married, but it really won’t work to your benefit to have everyone and their mother following you around as you’re trying to find your dress. Limit yourself to a maximum of three people. You may have a huge bridal party, but they will all see the dress eventually. Have you ever heard the expression “too many cooks in the kitchen”? There will be way too many opinions every time you come out in a new dress. Your grandma will think you look cute in everything, your dad will want you to try on something more modest, and your best friend, even if she’s married, will be jealous of you no matter what.

Pick your shopping help based on honesty and trust. This experience is about you. Limiting the amount of people around will keep you focused, supported and emotionally sound. When you attend your first fitting you are free to invite everyone…except your fiance, of course!

I don’t have a fashion degree and I’ve only done this once, but I hope my advice and experiential knowledge will help you feel more prepared and less stressed about the shopping trip of a lifetime. Congrats on your upcoming wedding, and in the end it’s only a dress. If he’s marrying you, he’ll think you look gorgeous in a paper bag.

Simple Wedding Guide